OBS Chapter 39: Camilla
Chapter 39: Camilla
Chapter 39: Camilla
Camilla chomps down on her steak, uncaring about the stares some other elven women are giving her. Shes chewing and speaking without a worry in the world.
So, you are surprised by us Elves? You imagined we would be whats the term you used?
Aloof? I volunteer.
She snorts some of the water she was drinking through her nose.
Oh God, she laughs, sorry about that. Yeah, no. Thats the humans. Elves are pretty easy-going. Have you been living under a rock all this time?
I slowly chew my own rare steak and ponder. You would be surprised by how good it is, especially considering we imagine Elves as Nazi-vegans.
Well, Ive come here by chance. I come from very, very far away. And I cant really go back. I think.
Nah, Im fairly sure Im stuck here forever.
Camilla slows down her ravenous jaws for a second and cleans her mouth with a handkerchief. She looks a bit sadder now, and much more serious.
Care to tell me that story?
It makes me extremely uncomfortable to talk about this stuff. Honestly, Ive been doing pretty well in the
It makes me extremely uncomfortable to talk about this stuff, I say, choosing to voice my thoughts for once, Ive been doing pretty well here. I cant really say Im unlucky, but at the same time, I feel anxious. I feel like everything could come crashing down on me at any moment.
When I opened the bakery, my sisters didnt work for me. I didnt have any money to hire people and I could barely afford the equipment. I wanted to put my head in a piss bucket and drown myself.
This time, its my turn to snort water from my nose.
That cheered me up a little.
If you need help jumping off a cliff, just tell me.
Camilla winks at me and resumes eating her steak.
Yeah, I get the feeling. But I have to say, the piss-bucket does sound more original. I want to do something that puts my heart at ease, you know. Im not interested in adventuring, risking my life, or even pushing to become the biggest baker in existence. I want to bake my stuff, sell it, make some money, go eat a steak with a friend.This chapter is updated by
So, you wanted to seduce a heartless nutjob whose biggest fetish is learning new spells and crushing others with her wit and power, right?
I stare at Camilla, not that amused.
Then, said nutjob behaves like the nutjob she is, and you are surprised? Ha! I swear, HUMANS, shes laughing so hard that the server comes to our table and kindly asks to tone it down.
Oh, Joey, you are killing me.
Shes all red and can barely breathe.
I could have mustered up a lot of jokes about that if I had been in the right mood.
Im glad my pain is making your dinner so enjoyable.
Im not bitter, but neither that enthused.
She keeps laughing, hard, and she even bangs her hand on the table.
Oh, for all the rotten muffins and cupcakes. You are all sad and pouty because the nutjob said something mean! Joey, please, dont look at me like that, Im suffocating!
Man, Camilla is now taking deep breaths and giggling in between. You would be so foolish as to ask my sister Amelia to help you look after a puppy on the street. And then you would be surprised when she drowned you and the puppy, stole all your money and recipes with some necromantic magic, and made a bag out of the puppy.
Your sister knows necromantic magic?
Nah, but shes probably a witch. Or a bitch. Almost homophone, arent they? she snorts.
I snort as well.
Man, you are something, arent you? I start laughing too, the more I think about the absurdity of my situation and Camillas words.
Whats the next item on your list, getting Clodia to fall in love with you? Or you know what, why dont you go and jump off the walls of the city, maybe youll learn how to fly!
I narrow my eyes, even if Im still laughing.
Its time for the old bag of tricks to do its work.
Camilla, be ready, because Joey Luciani is going to pull his moves now, you little brat!